You Can’t Do Everything for Everyone by Melissa Heisler

heisler9404Recently I watched a TED Talk by Marla Spivak about why bees are disappearing. I learned a lot about how intertwined we are with nature and how some of our current behaviors are not only hurting animals and plants, but our future as well. However I am not writing to preach about environmental issues. What I would like to share is my realization about how we all go throughout our days without truly realizing how our actions and words have a ripple effect around us.

It is common knowledge that bees pollinate flowers. But Ms. Spivak explained, “Bees are not out there pollinating our food intentionally. They’re out there because they need to eat. Bees get all the protein they need from pollen and all the carbohydrates they need from nectar.” Because these little guys are hungry, they are actually providing the means of food production for humans and animals. Bees are not grand humanitarians; they are simply going about their day.

Many of the individuals I coach are humanitarians. They live to give. They give to their family, their children, their jobs, and usually they also have a deep desire to give to humanity and the world overall. Sometimes they give too much; putting a social agenda above their own needs resulting in burnout. Sometimes they feel unfulfilled or a failure if they are not doing “big enough” work, if they are not helping to make large societal changes, if they are not changing the lives of millions. When I saw this TED Talk, I found hope for all of my givers. We all do not have the means of Bill and Melinda Gates to do large scale programs. We all do not have the celebrity of Geena Davis to use for gender equality awareness. We all do not have the world platform of Pope Francis to call for the end of poverty. But each of us, each and every day, are able to effect the world around us.

Years after college a friend of mine who had just appeared in a movie with Denzel Washington told me he would not be an actor if it was not for me. I was confused. In college I never singled this person out to support and encourage. He told me of a single incident that changed his life. He didn’t want to audition for a play for fear of rejection. I told him if he didn’t audition, he was already rejected. If he did audition, he at least had a chance at a part. He did audition and he did get a part. To this day, I don’t have a recollection of this conversation. I was just going about my business like a busy bee. I just happened to provide the right words and encouragement at the right time to make a change in someone else’s life.

Giving money and time to volunteer organizations is noble, needed, and fulfilling. But we don’t have to give up our lives to give to others. Every day is a chance to give to others by just being ourselves. We can smile in a grocery line. We can help our elderly neighbor bring in the groceries. We can take a friend to the doctor. We can talk to a graduate about landing their first job. None of these activities would take a lot of time or necessarily take us out of our routine. We don’t need to start a non-profit in order to contribute. Just being aware during the day will show opportunities for helping those around us. And our little effort can have a big impact in the long run.

“If you wait until you can do everything for everybody, instead of something for somebody, you’ll end up not doing nothing for nobody.” ~ Malcom Bane

What can you do today in your daily routine to give a little to those around you?

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Melissa Heisler is a stress reduction expert, Type Me coach, speaker, and the author of From Type A to Type Me: How to Stop “Doing” Life and Start Living It. She is committed to guiding entrepreneurs and professionals to improve their health, increase their mental clarity, easily deal with difficult people, find peace in their current jobs, and improve their business effectiveness all through reducing their stress levels.
www.ItsMyLifeInc.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissaheisler
https://www.facebook.com/itsmylifeinc

The Cost of Business as Usual by Melissa Heisler

heisler9404Most individuals in current business environments have the feeling of being chained to one’s desk for an inhuman amount of hours, running to endless meetings, and being bombarded by constant emails and calls. Many employees are doing the work of two or more people these days. Associates are being held accountable for unrealistic sales goals. Everything is a crisis. The result is stress. And a lot of it.

The irony is that the more hectic our day, the more stress we experience and the less productive we become. When we are stressed, our fight-or-flight system kicks in, the same unconscious system which takes over if we are in physical danger. All of our energy goes into our muscles to help us run or fight. Our digestive, reproductive, and immune systems are turned off. The longer we are stressed, the longer our basic systems are turned off causing ulcers and other digestive issues, along with a host of other physiological problems. The fight-or-flight system runs on autopilot so our cognitive mind is cloudy. Since our minds are constantly cloudy our work is slower, inefficient, and ineffective.

One great way to combat our daily stress is to disconnect from our fight-or-flight limbic brains and allow our normal bodily functions to return to normal. We can do this by simply taking a walk once or twice a day, or getting up from our desk every hour to do a few minutes of physical movement. Many employees can also find relief using meditation during the work day to help them disconnect from their reactionary stressed-based minds and reconnect with their effective, intuitive, calm cognitive minds.

Changing expectations about communication reaction time can also make a big difference. Many employees feel a prisoner of their electronics. When the communication pops up, they stop what they are doing, read the email, determine it is not urgent, and go back to the original project. When the next email pops up, the cycle repeats. The result is being constantly busy but getting nothing done. Working this way is an amazing waste of time and focus. Instead of constantly checking in with communications, turn off notifications for email, texts and social media, and instead carve out time slots during the day to check communications. This allows for better focus, more efficiency, and less stress.

When you do take a moment to look at the communications, open each only once and act upon it in that moment. Choose to either Do, Delegate, Delay, or Delete.

  • Do: Respond and complete the request in that moment.
  • Delegate: Is this the highest and best use of your time? Is there someone else you can delegate this to?  Is there an automated system you can put in place to handle a specific type of email?
  • Delay: If the email does not need to be handled right now, but it does need to be done by you, add a reminder to come back to it. Don’t just leave it in your inbox as you may then open it again in the future only to delay it again. Color code the email as a “future” and set up a follow-up reminder.
  • Delete: Does this need to be done at all? Is there really anything you need to address with it? If you find you are constantly deleting emails from certain sources, you may want to unsubscribe from the list or remove yourself from the project.

Adding in movement, disconnecting from the day, and shifting your relationship with communication, can help reduce some of your workplace stress leading to more productivity and increased wellness.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Melissa Heisler is a stress reduction expert, Type Me coach, speaker, and the author of From Type A to Type Me: How to Stop “Doing” Life and Start Living It. She is committed to guiding entrepreneurs and professionals to improve their health, increase their mental clarity, easily deal with difficult people, find peace in their current jobs, and improve their business effectiveness all through reducing their stress levels.
www.ItsMyLifeInc.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissaheisler
https://www.facebook.com/itsmylifeinc